B'shaa Tova Natalie Portman, I Have Your Boots

I write to you all from the holiest of cities, Jerusalem! And who better to talk about than the most famous Jewish, once-lived-in-Israel, said-she-would-marry-a-Jew-but-isn't, having-a-baby-with-goy, actress than Natalie Portman. Don't get me wrong, she's one of my faves, but I have some [kosher] beef with her right now--way to make your Jewish parents proud, Nat.

Anyway, the mommy-to-be was seen arriving at LAX in these Tretorn boots looking super cute, and not at all like she just traveled anywhere, whereas I am about to take an excrutiatingly long, cross-world flight, and I will probably come off looking like Johnny Depp in Edward Scissorhands. Or Johnny Depp in Pirates of the Carribean. Or Johnny Depp in Sweeny Todd. Hmmm... I am sensing a trend.

In any case, friends, I shall return to you shortly, but in the meantime, let me get my holiness on and bless you all with the fashion sense Johnny Depp has not. As for you, Natalie...your kids is still Jewish. Score.

Shalom

D